Arranged Marriages Vs. Marrying For Love | Sadhguru Discusses Success, Responsibility & Happiness


In today’s society, relationships and the concept of marriage are undergoing rapid changes. As people navigate the complexities of modern life, the question of whether arranged marriages or self-chosen unions are more effective continues to spark debate.

Sadhguru, a widely respected yogi and spiritual leader, provides valuable insights into this topic, shedding light on the essence and practicality of relationships in the contemporary world.

Understanding Marriage Beyond Cultural Practices

In his video, Sadhguru addresses the ongoing discourse about the relevance of arranged marriages in today’s time, especially in the context of its portrayal on platforms like Netflix.

Arranged Marriages Vs. Marrying For Love

He eloquently argues that the success of a marriage transcends its form—whether arranged or self-chosen. Sadhguru states, “Marriage is not about how it happened… It is best it is arranged by responsible sensible people.”

Statistics reflect a broader perspective on the effectiveness of different forms of marriage. Luxembourg, which is considered one of the most economically prosperous and free societies, has a divorce rate of 87%, whereas the United States has a 43% divorce rate.

Contrastingly, India has a notably low divorce rate of 1.5%. Sadhguru attributes this to the fact that, traditionally in India, marriages organized by parents or elders with a more long-term view have proven to be more enduring.

The True Nature of Arranged Marriages

The notion of arranged marriages often conjures images of forced, exploitative unions. However, Sadhguru clarifies that all marriages, by nature, are arranged—whether by parents, friends, oneself, or even modern dating apps.

Arranged Marriages Vs. Marrying For Love

He urges individuals to look beyond superficial judgments and focus on the intent behind these arrangements. “Arranged marriage is a wrong terminology all marriages are arranged by whom is the only question,” he reiterates.

The primary advantage of an arranged marriage, according to Sadhguru, is that it is often organized by individuals who have the couple’s best interests at heart.

He emphasizes, “Parents… will think a little long term,” considering factors that young individuals may overlook in their youthful enthusiasm or under social pressure.

Personal Experience and Wisdom

Sadhguru shares a personal anecdote about his own marriage to illustrate that the success of a relationship largely depends on the individuals involved. He recounts that when he decided to marry, he did not know his wife’s full name, her father’s name, or her social standing.

Arranged Marriages Vs. Marrying For Love

He simply chose to marry the person, devoid of any extraneous attributes. “When I married I did not know her full name I did not know her father’s name… I said I’m marrying only the girl,” Sadhguru recounts.

By setting an example, Sadhguru highlights the responsibility and commitment each individual must bring into a marriage, irrespective of how it was arranged.

“Who you marry how you marry which way it was arranged by who it was arranged is not important how responsible you exist that’s all that matters,” Sadhguru asserts.

Approaching Relationships with Responsibility and Joy

A key takeaway from Sadhguru’s discourse is the notion that the quality of a marriage—and indeed, any relationship—hinges on the responsibility and joy that each partner brings into it. He uses humor and wisdom to caution against entering marriage with unrealistic expectations or out of a sense of dependency.

Arranged Marriages Vs. Marrying For Love

For instance, Sadhguru humorously narrates an anecdote about a young couple where the woman tells her fiancé that she would be there to share his pains and struggles, to which he replies that he does not have any pains—she responds, “Well we are not yet married.”

This light-hearted story underscores a profound truth: marriage should not be seen as a solution to personal issues or a means to lean on someone else for happiness. Instead, it must be a union of two individuals who come together to enhance each other’s lives.

“If you think you’re are full of pain struggles problems and you need somebody to lean on well there will be trouble,” Sadhguru advises.

Sadhguru concludes by encouraging individuals to first cultivate joy and well-being within themselves. This internal fulfillment naturally extends into their relationships, making marriages and partnerships richer and more meaningful.

Recommended Reading

Karma: A Yogi’s Guide to Crafting Your Destiny by Sadhguru” by Sadhguru offers a profound exploration of the concept of karma, demystifying it as more than just a mechanism of reward and punishment.

Sadhguru presents karma as a tool for self-empowerment, encouraging readers to take control of their actions and reactions to shape their own destinies.

With his characteristic blend of wisdom and wit, Sadhguru breaks down complex spiritual ideas into accessible insights, making this book a valuable guide for anyone seeking to live a more conscious and intentional life.

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